I’ve recently started a rewatch of Apple TV’s Ted Lasso (this and The Good Place are my emotional support binge-watches). For those unfamiliar with the show, it’s a fish out of water comedy about an American college football coach hired to lead a struggling English Premiere League football (soccer) team. But it’s not a show about sports. Ultimately, it’s about building healthy relationships among individuals and in a community. Early on in the show, when a sports writer asks him what success would look like to a coach who doesn’t understand the game, Ted answers, “Success is not about the wins and losses. It’s about helping these young fellas be the best versions of themselves, on and off the field.” And for the remainder of its three seasons, the show sets out to do just that on the field and in the back office. The one-man-showboating superstar grows to become a true team player. His model girlfriend declares her independence from him and finds her true calling. The past-his-prime all-star breaks down his walls to become the leader he needs to be. And in the process, the audience gets to see examples of healthy, intimate friendships – friendships between men that aren’t rooted in toxic masculinity, between women that aren’t centered on the men in their lives, and between men and women that aren’t centered on the pursuit of sex. True, deep connections. Radical!
Ultimately, Ted Lasso, is a story about the power of belonging – of committing to something of value that’s bigger than any of us while becoming our whole, human selves and forging real connections to other whole human selves. It tells the story without being preachy. It doesn’t put any one character on a pedestal, and is often heartbreakingly honest about the characters’ flaws. And it shows that the community and the relationships that are built are plausible. It holds up a window onto a potential way of being and says, “See? It’s a struggle, but it’s possible.”
It’s that possibility that keeps me turning back to the show when times are hard and I’m struggling with hope. The phrase beloved community gets tossed about in our church world regularly (I know, I’ve done some of that tossing), sometimes to the point where I fear it loses meaning. And sometimes it feels like an impossible goal. But the lesson of Ted Lasso is that building Beloved Community isn’t about creating a utopia. It isn’t about an end product at all. It is a process, a continual work in progress – uncovering out better selves, helping others do the same, and in turn creating a community that becomes its better self, one person at a time, one day at a time.
☼
I’ll be taking a week of study leave beginning on Monday, February 10th. I’ll be back in the office Tuesday, February 18th. This is for me to renew, get caught up on reading and advanced sermon prep, and work on some longer-term writing. I’ll be available that week for emergencies only.
See you in church!